How do we deal with past disappointments when we work on our life story manuscripts?
All of us have things in our past, done by us or to us, that cause us pain. We might regret our actions. Maybe we have remorse over things we have done.
What to do, what to do?
Well, it is not good to let that stop you from writing and sharing your story. But you also shouldn’t ignore or whitewash the past.
You can learn from your mistakes and from past events. Painful as they may be, there can be a silver lining.
It is easy to get frustrated or disheartened when facing hard truths about your own or others’ actions. Let’s face it, we all are human and as such prone to imperfection.
Everyone has this as part of their story. Denying it won’t make your story better. And making excuses can also be dangerous. It’s better to face the facts. Realize the truth in “to err is human and to forgive is divine.” That includes forgiving yourself.
Sometimes we experience hardships and difficulties that are not our fault. That can be a bitter pill to swallow. And it can breed despair. But being able to accept what happens is a start. And you should recognize that acceptance doesn’t necessarily mean approval.
One of the things that helps me when I feel stuck in regret or remorse, or frustrated about events that put me in fear of the future is to find some quiet time.
When I allow myself to calm down, be present to the moment and just breathe I give myself some space to respond rather than react.
The other thing I find helpful after my calming period is to get into some kind of action. It could be exercise, or getting with friends or community. Taking a hike or walk in nature can do wonders.
Like it or not, life goes on. And part of healthy living is going with the flow.
There is a saying, “Don’t push the river.”
I understand that to mean that trying to go against the current, in fact to try to force the current to change directions, is a gigantic waste of energy.
Yes, we can and should stand up for what is right. But also learn to compromise when that is in the best interest. And find ways to make peace with life’s many challenges.
It is not easy. But it is worthwhile.